Searria H.

Please help me. It needs a lot of work. :D -Sea- ******************** The boy smiled in agreement and turned to retrieve his coat. I need to follow him. I told ...

There was a good idea here, but I didn't really feel anything for your character. It was too short. You tell us that she had been the target of a ...

First of all, welcome to YWS! I'm Searria, but you can call me Sea. You have a good idea for a poem here, but the wording in some places is ...

This was a beautiful poem. It sort of reminded me of the song, "In Flander's Fields." As has been said, your imagry was excellent and I loved the subtle metaphors ...

AAHH! I love Pocky! I especially like the strawberry kind. I really like this picture. For the simplicity of it, the objects are arranged in such away to make it ...

This was a very nice poem with a well-written analogy. The flow was very broken, and I had trouble finding a rythym, and since this poem sort of has a ...

This used to be titled, "Kidnapping Freedom," but I didn't like that, so I changed it. I really need critiques on this because I'm giving it to one of my ...

I really like this poem, but I do have to agree with West. Sometime, it seemed as though you were trying a little too hard. Oh, and the Lyric Poetry ...

Very nice poem. I really like the title as well. Since this is obviously a free-style poem, I'm not going to nag about rhythm and patterns, etc. It would almost ...

Yay for Ladybugs! 1)I love the contrast between the red of the ladybug and the leaves. I also like the fact that the insect sort of looks like a red ...

Okay. This was interesting. Low tree branches whacked him in the face, but he kept going ignoring the brief stinging. I think you could revise this sentence to be a ...

She's kind of cute. :D I think the problem with her chin is that it can't have that little dip in the line. Try taking a picture of yourself or ...

This really made me laugh because when I was little, I tripped over a door mat and apologized to it. I'm just weird like that. I'm not sure that your ...

I'm not a big fan of cinquains. They seem too limiting to me. To pull a poem like this off, you need to use really descriptive words and you have ...

Cute poem. I once wrote a short story about eating cherries because I have a very strange way of eating them. Anyway... Your rhyming pattern is constant, but your rythym ...